Families Are Forever

I haven't posted in a while because I have had a hard time knowing how to put this up here, and I haven't wanted to post anything else until I get this up here.  By now most who read this blog are already aware of it through other means, but here it goes.
In January we found out we were expecting our fourth child, and we were very excited.  Aside from me being very sick, tired, and sore things progressed well.  We had our ultrasound and found out we would be having a little girl.  Everything looked good on the ultrasound; she looked healthy and well.  On Aug 14, I started having real contractions and we finally went in to get me checked out.  I was very nervous because she was 9 1/2 weeks early.  At the hospital they determined that she was indeed coming, and they took me to the OR because it was closest to the NICU.  One of the doctors asked if they had confirmed presentation with ultrasound, which they then did and found out she was breach.  So they performed an emergency C-section, and got her out.  She had difficulties from the beginning and they had a hard time getting her stabilized.  She had some abnormal anatomy that wasn't allowing her to process her urine back into the amniotic sac, so she had no amniotic fluid while in utero and she had very severe edema (swelling).  She was born in the evening and they kept her in the NICU overnight and were planning on flying her to the children's hospital up in Salt Lake the next day.  They were able to stabilize her overnight, and prepped her for Life Flight in the mid-morning.  She was on the transport cart hooked up and ready to go when her heart stopped.  They tried very hard to save her, but it was not meant to be.  She lived a total of 14 hours on this earth.  We named her Rachel Garner.
All of this was a very big shock to us, as we had thought that everything was perfectly fine with her.  We are so grateful to the many providers who helped us during this ordeal.  Her doctors were amazing as well as the doctors and nurses who took care of me.  We were very blessed to have such good care. 
This has been one of the hardest things in our lives, and yet it has also been one of the sweetest as well.  We feel so privileged to have this little girl be a part of our family now.  We know that she has returned to live with our Heavenly Father and that she is watching us from Heaven, waiting for us to return as well.  We have felt so much peace through this whole experience, and know that it was meant to be this way.  People often give us disbelieving looks when we tell them that we are doing well in response to their questions.  But we really are doing well.  Yes, we miss our daughter, and we sorrow at her loss.  Yet we rejoice in the knowledge that she is not lost forever, that we are an eternal family, and that we will see her again.  We know that the Lord is in charge and that His plan is perfect.  We know that He is watching over us, and loves us. 

These are some pictures of her just after she had passed away.  You can see how swollen she was.

 This was us in my hospital bed.

 This is right before we buried her.  My friend made her the dress and the bonnet, and another friend made her some little booties.

 

And this is her headstone that now marks her grave. 

 

We were able to have family come down for the funeral, and it was a beautiful simple service.  We have had amazing support from family and friends, and are so grateful to all.